selfishness

I told you

I am selfish

I don’t expect

Others to look after me

I do it myself

I can never be sure

Others will follow

Processes

Mandates

Methodology

I know by rote

Because

I wrote them

For years

I was nowhere

In my list of priorities

It was family

Career

And

Anything else that

Hijacked my time

I remember thinking

The five minutes

I sat on the hammock

At five

Drinking coffee

Before the house woke up

And the rigors of the day took over

That was my time

My only time

That I could call my own

Slowly I started demanding

Time of me

For me

And I said

I am priority too

At least in my own scheme of things

That was the beginning of

My selfishness

Sometimes I forget

Or at least pretend

I hand over the baton

To someone else

And he drops it

And the relay is broken

The race is lost

I pick me up again

Dust me nicely

Dress up the wounds

And go back to

The start line

This time no relay please

I will win my race

By myself, thank you